Dragons

I read today that Chicago Bears linebacker and presumptive Nobel Prize winner Brian Urlacher is being fined $100,000 dollars by the NFL for drinking vitamin water and wearing a hat. This is no way to treat the man who invented modern linebacking, the internet, the four post bed, and who picked up the slack on the 9/11 commission while Lee Hamilton took four prostitutes on his boat for a week. In light of this, I am collecting donations to help Brian offset the fine. I will pocket these donations and then concentrate on sending Brian good vibes. I hope you will contribute.